...what do you say about suckers like this guy:
Dear Abby:
I was still in high school when I met “Sue.” She was in her 20s and gorgeous. I was a virgin. Her husband was in the military.
One day she told me she was lonely. She asked me to be her “special friend.” After high school she paid for me to go to trade school. For 29 years I followed her wherever the military sent her husband. I even had a vasectomy so I wouldn’t get her pregnant.
Her husband has retired. She has time for me now maybe once a month. What we had is fading more each week. I’ll never find anyone to love as I have loved her, or father children of my own....
Now, I'll be the first to say that the nookie really messes with your mind, but packing up and moving only God knows how many times? And a vasectomy? Really? Without any kind of firm commitment from this woman — with her basically telling him he had to share her? Damn. Either this woman was incredibly good in bed or this man was incredibly desperate. Perhaps both. As for this...
I have more respect for a man who sticks with his family providing support and raising his kids but finds a sexual relationship outside the home. You want to know what I think is toxic? A man who stays married and celibate, letting his resentment fester and build.
...I don't agree with all of that. It seems to me that such a situation (finding your romantic or sexual fulfillment outside of your marriage) leads to effectively teaching your kids that's the best way to do things, and that's not doing them any favors...because how many people out there would want to be in that arrangement? I will say, though, that I absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts, 99 44/100 percent agree with that last part. When you get denied intimacy and companionship, your resentment will fester and build, and it is indeed the most toxic thing ever. It will get you to the point that you don't even want to remain friends. Especially when the other person starts to pull away, to the point they're sleeping on the couch while you lie upstairs wondering what the hell you did to make the other person not want to be next to you anymore; when the other person gets to the point of being gone for what amounts to more than half the time and making lame excuses for it; and finally, the other person hits you with that "I feel like we're more best friends" thing and you don't have a clue as to just why it happened. They might blame it on their own issues with the opposite sex, in a lame, hollow attempt to make you feel better, and say they're not worth being hurt and angry over, but it'll still leave you that way because you ended up holding the bag because they sat on their ass and didn't deal with their issues before putting themselves on the damn market again. Ask me how I know...
Ooooh, I love me some Stevie Ray, on Deep Tracks, Sirius Ch. 16: "Well, I'm standin' next to a mountain, chop it down, with the edge of my hand..." Hendrix's version was really good as well, but I always preferred the SRV cover.
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